the art of being empty
by PerfectPerception
Summary: By a twist of fate, Starfire is the one who destroys Saico-Tek and she immediately flees conviction. Two years later, her name is cleared and she rejoins the titans. But when she finally returns, she's not alone. — a loose adaptation of Red Hood and the Outlaws; Starfire, Robin and the disjointed distance between them.


**Author's Notes:** This is a bit of a 'plot without point' kind of one-shot and obviously an AU but everything is relatively canon-compliant up till the movie and, like I mentioned in the summary, has a VERY LOOSE adaptation of the DC comic series, _Red Hood and the Outlaws_. So please don't expect that entire universe/storyline merged into this Teen Titans universe!

Also, for the purpose of this story, I'm still going to refer to Speedy as Speedy, not Arsenal or Roy. This is also a fairly LONG story. I was going to break it up into two chapters, but I couldn't find a clean place to break it up unfortunately! Anyway, that should wrap up my notes. Enjoy and thanks for reading!

* * *

 **Prelude**

 _Blurry photos, shifty, prolonged pixelated videos from out of date camera phones, high-resolution streams from quality camcorders capture and repeatedly broadcast the messy, bloody aftermath:_

 _She stands over the ruined body of Saico-Tek, blood splattered against her golden skin. She's panting heavily, eyes wide with terror, and she looms over him, touching his shoulder as she tries to shake him awake. He doesn't stir._

 _"You killed him!" someone screeches. Screams and gasps filter the air and she turns to the approaching crowd recording and snapping pictures of the grisly scene._

 _"No! I did not — I… I did not mean to!" she tries to reason, to rectify, but the city's law force is circling her, red and blue neon lights flashing and illuminating around her._

 _Time's running out; they're coming for her._

 _If only she could speak with her teammates, with_ Robin _— someone, anyone, could explain more thoroughly that she didn't mean to hurt Saico-Tek. This isn't her fault, she couldn't have possibly meant to hurt him this badly… But blood is dripping from her very own trembling hands and she knows there's no way out._

 _It's just too late._

 _She shoots past the gathering authorities and crowd, zooming skywards as far from the city as she can, disappearing into the night._

 ** _—_ _—_**

" _And in today's news, we return to a notorious homicide case that occurred nearly two years ago by the Teen Titans' former member, Starfire. Allegedly, a criminal going by the name of Saico-Tek was publically murdered by the Titan and she fled the scene shortly after. Today, however, the Teen Titans were able to clear her name upon the discovery that Japan's very own top commander of the Tokyo's supernatural defense force, Mr. Uehara Daizo, created Saico-Tek among many of Japan's other villains who attempted to destroy the titans. These creations are, supposedly, some type of mindless androids; therefore, clearing Starfire of any and all murder allegations._

 _During their press conference, the Teen Titans stated that they hope this interview reaches her and wish to be reunited with their fellow teammate soon…_

 _…As for Starfire, her current whereabouts are unknown._ "

* * *

 **the art of being empty**

..

..

..

The room is adorned with pink and purple balloons with colorful streamers running horizontal and vertically across the walls, confetti scattered along the carpet. Off to the side is a table nearly overflowing with various foods; the words WELCOME HOME STARFIRE messily scrawled with frosting across a large cake being the centerpiece of the table. Noises ricochet against the walls by a teeming group of bodies dispersed within the room and only quiet when Robin purposefully clears his throat while standing in the middle of the area with his arms stiffly crossed over his chest.

When he's satisfied with their undivided attention directed toward him, he finally speaks.

"Alright guys, settle down. They'll be here any minute."

A cloaked figure steps forward, a girl's faint voice quietly suggesting, "we should probably wait downstairs to let them in."

"Oh! I um, sort of forgot to lock the door when I let the Titans East in so it should be open for them… So, uh, problem solved, right? Hey — _ow_! That hurt, Raven!"

"Don't forget to lock the door next time, idiot," scolds Raven, darkly eying a guilty green boy with her hand still raised threateningly.

"Huh, someone else is being an idiot besides me?" an unfamiliar voice suddenly cuts across the room.

At the drop of the unexpected voice, the gathering of young heroes suddenly crane their necks or spin around toward the open entrance of the living room.

"Speedy!" the Titans East's only female member, Bumblebee, cries abruptly in delight and excited yells and whoops splatter across the walls shortly after and without any other further delay, the welcome back party beings.

Admittedly, Robin's a little overwhelmed with the amount of sounds and people inhabiting the tower's common area. He's never been the one for socializing, generally opting for a quiet room to research, but he's handling the current unfamiliar experience the best he can, shooting a few occasional glares at his roommates whenever he has the opportunity.

He can fully blame _them_ for all of this, to be honest.

At first, he prompted for a small dinner to welcome back their teammate in some hole-in-the-wall restaurant he frequented when he wanted to get out, but his friends — namely Beast Boy — fought for a party instead. Their cybernetic buddy, Cyborg, ended the argument with the simple statement that Starfire would rather have some sort of festive gathering than a boring dinner any day and thus the celebration planning began.

With no other option or leverage, Robin begrudgingly accepted the change of plans and let those two organize everything, with Raven's rare input dashed in. Honestly the Titans East were probably just thrown in for good measure by Beast Boy to further piss off his leader, and because he figured Speedy would've felt less awkward.

Consequently, he couldn't find anyone to help welcome Speedy and Starfire's 'new' friend, Red Hood, but the boy looks nearly as uncomfortable and bored with the party as Robin does right now anyway.

The aforementioned titan pulls himself out of his rather gloomy thoughts when Más y Menos unwarrantedly join him on the couch, jabbering to one another rapidly in Spanish, and he scans the heavily occupied room. He frowns when he can't find the one person he's looking for, slipping away from the two twins unnoticed.

When he finally finds her she's leaning against one of the kitchen's counters near the room's sink, her eyes staring unblinkingly ahead. She appears fixated on something outside and when he tries to follow the trail of her gaze, he's met with nothing but pastel red ambers, peach oranges and dewy yellows and greens of the day's setting sunset. With one hand on the marble counter supporting her weight, she tilts forward more while her other hand's fingertips dance on a large bottle of mustard. Everything feels oddly in place once again.

Starfire's here; she's finally _home_.

But the serenity of this fragmented moment is soon torn from them as he takes a hesitant step forward, breaking her unwavering focus once his footstep echoes across the tiled floor. She abruptly spins around at the startling sound, her hands up almost in a defensive way but soon lowers them to her sides, appearing flustered at her rather disquieted motions.

"Oh, friend Robin," she blushes, her smile uneasy. "Forgive me. I did not hear your presence until seconds ago."

He shakes his head, dismissing her apology. "It's fine, I should've said something when I came in. You just looked so… uh, preoccupied with watching the sunset, I didn't want to disrupt you is all."

"I truly appreciate that," she grins earnestly at him. "I have forgotten what the sunset looks like from this city. It is quite pleasant to behold."

She pauses momentarily and he attentively watches her fingers tighten around her bottle filled with the pungent yellow condiment; abruptly realizing this time with her is beginning to run out. Her eyes are suddenly looking elsewhere, anywhere that isn't near Robin, and she begins to maneuver around him, "anyway, I should return to—"

"Starfire." His tone is colored with consternation and she can't help but stop at the drop of her name. It sounds so foreign falling from his lips. When she finally lifts her eyes to meet his, he manages to find his voice again. "Why… why didn't you contact any of us?"

"Because I did not wish to further hinder your investigation or compromise your innocence," she answers lamely, the lack of a climax making them both uncomfortable as they shift in their respectable places.

She looks down, breaking their gaze, and starts to idly run a finger across a small chip in the kitchen's island counter. If she remembers correctly, it was from when things became a little explosive between Cyborg and Beast Boy as they argued passionately over the last remains of their favorite cereal box years back. One thing led to another and the green animorph was bouncing wildly around the room with his cybernetic teammate shooting stunning rays at him, narrowly missing him and taking a chunk of the countertop instead. But that memory is nearly stretching too far from her now, its becoming blurry and unclear, and this festering unfamiliarity admittedly leaves a small, gaping hole in her heart so she tries not dwell on it too long.

Eventually, she presses forth. "Robin, if I communicated with any of you during your time of the investigation and you concealed any information on my whereabouts or interaction with me, you would be considered an accomplice and associated with the guilty, correct?"

Robin frowns at her rather equitable explanation. Admittedly, she's right on both respective legal and personal levels. With a rather astute argument from himself and Raven, the rest of the Titans were cleared of any crime, seeing as they weren't present during Starfire and Saico-Tek's fight. She, however, was guilty with no room for her friends to object. She just didn't want to pull any of them under with her — she didn't want them to become swept away by the same suspect waters she was drowning in and by doing so, she vanished out of Japan's scrutinizing gaze as well as her friends' own ones.

It was a consequence, a sacrifice she so readily made that he's still unwilling to fully swallow yet.

"But not even a sign to just let us know you were alive and okay during the past two years?"

"Red Hood did not think of that as an applicable idea," she replies stiffly but her eyes soften slightly as she carries on, "it was not safe… _You_ were not safe; I could not put you in any further danger. I was, as you say, 'doing the right thing'."

Robin feels the corners of his mouth become weighted down even more. They're only standing a mere few feet away but he never felt so disconnected and so far from her in his entire life. It's a jarring kind of feeling, almost cruel, as he mulls over the fact that this ethereal, unworldly girl who's standing before him is suppose to be his best friend, but now she can hardly look him in the eye. Her words that were once so empathetic and warm now sound so unfamiliar and disengaged he can barely grasp onto them, like she's purposefully distancing them farther and farther away from one another with every sentence she breathes out. His chest tightens achingly at that thought.

Suddenly another figure pops uninvited into the room and consequently shatters the building tension between the pair upon his arrival.

"Out of guac," mutters Speedy hastily as he tries to duck his head somewhat and attempt to not make any eye contact with either of the two.

However, his interruption unintentionally gives Starfire the opportunity of escape. Without any hesitation, she quickly grabs a few sodas from the refrigerator and, along with her large container of mustard, traipses into the living room with the airy verbal intent of refilling any empty drinks. But Speedy's not as lucky and soon finds himself cornered by Robin instead.

Much like Robin and Starfire, this is the first time Speedy and the titan's leader spoke privately in years.

The ginger-haired boy appears as if he knew it was coming, however, visibly bracing himself from the impact of Robin's imminent questioning.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

 _Why didn't you tell me you were running around the world with her?_

Speedy gives him a curt shrug of the shoulders before answering flatly, "she didn't want me to. Something-something about guilty by association, I'm sure you already heard the entire spiel by now and she's right, you know. Being in contact with me, and her by extension, could've gotten you and your team into big trouble, man. If the police caught whiff of any possible chance… well, every single one of your clues; every lead would be discredited, and even though you cleared _her_ name, you guys could've faced some serious legal issues by not disclosing that you were communicating with her."

"Didn't know you were so familiar with the legal system," grates Robin, clearly unimpressed by Speedy's unwarranted explanation of why Starfire was, as she so vehemently assured, 'doing the right thing'.

Because, damn it, he _knows_ she was doing the right fucking thing, but that still didn't make what she did any more digestible, any easier to accept.

Speedy smirks. "Well, when you're running around with a guy who likes to take the law into his own hands occasionally, you've got to know every loophole and every soft spot where you can bend the system just a little bit."

"How'd you even get involved with _that_ guy?"

The archer relaxes a little at the sudden shift of subject, his shoulders slumping forward as he flexes his jaw lazily.

"Chance of fate," he eventually answers very vaguely, before grabbing for the bowl of guacamole resting near them. He peers down at the green concoction, murmuring more to it than Robin, "things weren't working out with the Titans East. Under mutual terms, I left a few months before the entire Tokyo incident. Some, um, things happened and I crossed paths with a reformed Red Hood and he was with Starfire. Everything kind of… fell into place after that, I guess. And well, now here we are."

He pivots and begins to head out of the kitchen and into the room where the most source of noises are emitting from with Robin in reluctant toll. Before they fully merge with their lively group of friends — Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Kid Flash haughtily yelling at one another as they engage in some sort of co-op racing video game, Raven, Starfire and Bumblebee talking quietly off to the side, and the rest of Speedy's old teammates preoccupied in some kind of complicated board game — the archer peers over his shoulder, tarrying in his place momentarily.

"He's probably on the roof, if you're wondering."

He leaves Robin to stand under the connecting rooms' archway, allowing his words to hold the quiet hum of the tower's air conditioner and settle in the raven-haired boy's ears.

..

..

..

The flame of Red Hood's lighter flares vividly against the dying daylight bleeding into dusk. He sweeps it across the tip of his cigarette before clamping the steel mechanical device shut and pushes it back into one of his pants' pockets. Smoke swirls above him and he sighs softly in fleeting satisfaction, cocking his head to the side when he hears the rooftop's doorknob jiggle slightly.

"Ah, Chuckles, come here to watch the sunset with me? How romantic."

"Smoking's going to kill you one day," frowns the Boy Wonder and Red Hood laughs callously at the observation.

"I'm sure I'll be dead by the time cancer decides to take me."

"Are you even old enough to buy cigarettes?"

"I find my ways," Red Hood drawls, pulling his metal helmet off his head. The fading light of the sun falls over every crevice and structure of his revealed features and Robin finds himself glowering at the familiar face of a boy who was supposed to have been buried six feet under years ago. His failed successor for the dark night's sidekick mantle once he left to form the Teen Titans. "Besides, I'm almost of age. Or have you forgotten my birthday already?"

"You're supposed to be dead," Robin deadpans and Jason Todd sends him a ruthless smile.

"That's the thing with heroes," sneers Jason, knocking the tip of his finger against his cigarette to ash off the built up burning embers of its cherry, "they never really stay dead, do they?"

"I thought you didn't like playing the hero," the titan's leader hears himself say; repeating himself from years ago.

"Change of plans," shrugs his counterpart.

Robin taps his foot impatiently, his composure beginning to run thin at the ambiguous and bleary responses he's been getting all day from the rather questionable heroic trio. "What? You weren't getting enough satisfaction from the Red X getup? Or did you really miss being the hero?"

"Red X was a nice start over — a do over, if you will — when I realized working under Bats wasn't the job for me," Jason informs sharply. "It got me what I wanted: Time to figure out what the hell I was doing. Just so happens when I finally did, I ran into your precious girlfriend."

He smirks maliciously when Robin stiffens at the implication of Starfire.

"My mistake, she's never really been your girlfriend, has she? Missed chances, missed opportunities, or is it just because you're a fucking idiot—" His words are cut from the tip of his tongue as Robin grabs violently ahold of his shoulder, jerking him closer. A ruthless snarl stretches Jason's lips apart, visibly unaffected by the bone-crushing grip the Boy Wonder has on him. "Ah, Robin, now there's your temper I remember. Looks like some thing's never change, huh?"

Robin glowers at the taller boy within his tighten grasp, remaining eerily calm as his free hand twitches slightly and he can feel Jason unintentionally tense, awaiting impact from his forthcoming fist. Except it never makes contact with Jason, or even form into a fist at all. Instead Robin plucks the cigarette still dangling in between the taller boy's fingers and he throws it on the ground, crushing it with the heel of his boot.

"You should really quit." He lets go of Jason's shoulder and his counterpart steps back a little upon release.

"Hmm," Jason comments derisively on Robin's rather anticlimactic antics, his hand rubbing his pinched skin, "maybe. But it's so _fun_ to watch the princess light one up for me with one of her starbolts."

"I swear if she started smoking because of you—"

"Relax Chuckles," dismisses the unmasked boy, throwing his hands dramatically up in mock defeat. "She doesn't, only helps me light one if I lost my lighter or matches. But," he slides in, locking eyes with Robin, "even if she does, that's really none of my business, now is it? And quite frankly, its none of yours either."

Robin feels his jaw clench furiously. "Of course it's my business, she's my friend."

"A distant memory, more like it," Jason scoffs.

"A distant memory that cares more for her well being than you obviously do."

Jason smirks, reveling in the way Robin visibly grits and grinds his teeth together in resentment. "Ah lighten up, Bird Brain. You're acting like she's some damsel in distress when you know damn well Starfire doesn't need much saving, she's too strong for that. Besides, _you know_ I care for her as much as your tactless ass does."

Robin exhales sharply, prying past the taller boy's disparaging insults. "You've been lucky since your apparent redemption, Jason. But you know as well as I do how dangerous being a hero _or_ villain can be. If you're not careful enough, she could get injured, someone could hurt her, and then what?"

"Easy," Jason deadpans, "I'll spread the leftover carcass of whoever hurt her across town."

Oddly, Robin appears somewhat satisfied with that answer and doesn't respond.

So the taller boy carries on instead. "Listen, Boy Blunder, I know you're used to being her number one priority in life and you're used to me always coming in second place, but things perpetually change; nothing remains the same. Remember that."

He can sense that Jason is implying something but he can't quite grasp onto it, not yet; instead he lets the reformed vigilante's words toll off into the awakened evening's inky black skies.

..

..

..

The party is still lively and boisterous when Robin returns.

Red Hood opted to stay on the roof and start another cigarette to replace the one Robin put out, leaving the titan's leader to reenter the celebration alone. He maneuvers easily around the socializing heroes, the frown on his face becoming more and more apparent as he walks toward his teammate, Raven.

She's currently engrossed in some old volume, evidently disinterested with the rest of the party raging on in the backdrop. She immediately senses him approach and before he can even get word out, she dully greets him, "yes, Robin?"

Well acquainted with the apathy coloring her tone, he simply asks as casually as he can, "do you know were Starfire is? I'm uh, worried she's not enjoying her party."

"She is," assures the empath, before informing, "she's in her room."

"In her room?"

Raven peers up from behind her book, an eyebrow quirked. "Yes, does that surprise you?"

"Um, I guess I just figured she'd want to be with everyone."

The girl sighs, gently closing the thick novel in her hands and places it aside to bring her entire attention on her friend. "Go talk to her."

Robin frowns, shaking his head. "I tried to earlier. In the kitchen. She didn't seem to want to."

"She wants to talk. To you, especially. But she doesn't want to be questioned," Raven rectifies and before he can defend himself, she presses forth, "I know how you are, Robin. We all do. You didn't just 'talk' to her, you cornered her and interrogated her. Trust me when I say we were all hurt when Starfire didn't contact us either, but we're not going around backing her into rooms demanding answers."

His face grows rather hot with embarrassment as Raven's words pierce through him, rendering him momentarily wordless. She's right. She's _always_ right.

"Just go."

For once, he listens without protest.

And then finds himself knocking hesitantly on Starfire's door. It slides open upon her command and he stands tensely at the threshold of her dark room.

She's laying on her old bed for some reason or another, perhaps for nostalgia purposes or something akin to that, and when she smiles at him he's suddenly spluttering out excuses as to why he's evidently encroaching upon her personal sphere.

"I just… I just wanted to see how you're doing," he says rather awkwardly, scratching the nape of his neck stiffly. "I was worried you weren't enjoying the party."

"Oh, it is most glorious!" she insists earnestly. "I just wished to visit my bedroom for a few moments."

He inhales slowly, bubbling anxiety stirring in the pit of his stomach. "Oh, okay. I'll just uh, leave you to yourself—"

"You seem most apprehensive standing there, Robin," she sweetly interjects, sending him a small grin and pats the empty area beside her on her mattress, scooting over a little bit, before offering, "you may lay here if you wish."

"Um, are… are you sure?" His question is met with her small laughter at his expense and he hastily mutters, "I mean, well, okay if you want…"

They had done this many times years ago, but all that familiarity has vanished over time and when he lies next to her, his body is tense. They're lankier now — with her still being maybe a half an inch or so taller than him — and more built than before, with long limbs and bodies that overtake a majority of her bed. He tries to ignore how close they are to one another.

On the other hand, she appears seemingly unaffected by their small distance. She's probably already used to their proximity, seeing as she traveled around with Red Hood and Speedy for years, and he begrudgingly assumes both boys most likely tended to overstep their boundaries with her.

His eyes trace the outline of her body bathing in the milky glow of the moonlight that's managed to flitter through the cracks of her room's shutters. She's not the same girl as he once remembers, her hair is longer, more fiery and the ends are faded to a bright yellow most likely from the sun bleaching it. It kind of reminds him of a flame, like the one that flickered at the end of Jason's lighter, wild and glittering amidst the darkness. The ridges of her face have smoothed out too; became more defined with maturity and her body is longer and graceful like a lynx, all muscle and smooth porcelain skin that feels intensely heated under his touch.

There's still an air of innocence about her, however; a small flare flickering within her core that reassures him that this is still Starfire. This celestial girl who is too incorporeal and quite out of his (or anyone else's) reach is still his past roommate, his once fierce teammate, _his friend_.

Under his steady gaze, she's nervously running her open palms across her silky comforter and comments absentmindedly, "my room… it is very… tidy."

"Are you surprised?" he half grins, looking skywards at her popcorn ceiling, and she nods. "Well, every Sunday — you know, chore day — we took turns cleaning your room so it wouldn't be too dusty or dirty whenever you came back."

Upon his explanation she lifts her upper body a little bit, resting her weight on her elbows as she peers to the side of her. "You wish for me to rejoin the titans?"

Robin keeps his stare fixated on the ceiling, trying hard not to concentrate on the fact that their arms are touching now. "Starfire, you were never _not_ a part of the team. We're not giving you permission or asking for you to rejoin… we're just welcoming you back."

The mattress dips as she slumps back into her laying position, now the soft skin of her shoulder grazing lightly against his and he finally garners enough courage to look at her again from the corner of his eye. He watches as her chest rises and falls elegantly in a weighted sigh and she then closes her eyes, her eyebrows furrowing together as she speaks.

"Robin, things are complicated…"

He swallows thickly. Is this what Jason was vaguely referring to earlier?

"So you're not… coming back." When she doesn't answer, he feels discomfort paint his lungs and compress his air as he tries to talk calmly to her again, but his words just come out in an unintentional strangled choke, "but… we're your _family_ , Star."

That shouldn't have stung, not at that intensity, but it does and she recoils slightly at a sharp ache that jolts up her chest.

"When I was on Tamaran, I understood the term and importance of family as entangled with diplomacy. The royal unit in which I was birthed from was regarded with rules and regulations, duties I had to uphold, and sacrificing my own feelings for the greater good of my people. But…"

She stops before turning her head to the side, her cheek resting on her bed as she gazes tentatively at him while carefully gauging his expression. With his mask, it's barely unreadable in the thick darkness of her room, the only source of light coming from silvery strands of the moon's pale glow cutting through the shadows. She gives up, unable to decipher his veiled countenance and continues.

"But when I came to earth, family had an entirely different meaning here. I always thought… I always felt that your family, your heart and home, are with those who you love and cherish the most," she bites her bottom lip, her breath hitching when he finally looks her. "Robin… I love and cherish you, as well as I do with the other titans."

He wants to speak, to respond with something — _anything,_ but instead air becomes lodged in the base of his throat and he can feel his face become feverish under her transfixed stare.

"But over the course of two years, Red Hood and Speedy have become my family as well," she finishes quietly. He can feel her tremble against him, and she brings a shaky hand to her chest, gripping the material of her uniform right above her left breast. "They are my heart and home too."

"So then this is it," he exhales throatily, looking away, "you're really not coming back."

"I do not know," she answers truthfully, painfully, "I am conflicted."

Her face falls back to its earlier position and she joins his fixated stare ahead, both unable to bring themselves to look at one another again for the time being. It just hurts too damn much.

"I understand," he manages quietly, "I… We just won't talk about that. Until you made your choice."

The hum of her room's overhead fan fills the empty space between them when their words cannot. It creaks faintly as it perpetually rotates, swaying the dust wildly around in the room before it can settle and collect on their still bodies.

Eventually she peers at him again with a cautious gaze until she flickers her vision elsewhere. "Friend Robin?"

"Yeah?"

"I, um… Forgive me, for this may be inappropriate to speak about, but I believe you should know—"

He sighs, "is this about Red Hood and Speedy?"

The way she flushes tells him yes. "Well…"

"It's alright, Star. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"It's just that… I, um, I had the 'relations' with Speedy…"

"I know," he deadpans and when he feels her curious stare bore into him, he clarifies, "I see the way he looks at you, Starfire. I'm not stupid. Is that another reason why you don't want to stay here?"

"No," she answers quickly and he arches his eyebrows in surprise. "We… He ended the relations."

Robin snorts. "He's an idiot."

"It was for the best," she concludes, tucking a curtain of her hair behind her ear. "He cared for me as I did with him, but things felt… off, I believe? Unstable."

"Oh."

"Yes," she murmurs softly, "I thought of when we, you and I, spoke last on that tower back in Tokyo, before I was attacked by Saico-Tek and fled. I recalled your own thoughts of wisdom regarding such a situation… of the 'responsibilities' heroes should always have over relationships."

Her echoing voice rings in his ears, beginning to vibrate and tear mercilessly at his insides.

"Perhaps you were correct, Robin. Perhaps we can be nothing more than heroes."

This is too, too much now. He needs to get out, he needs to leave before he can't subdue his festering guilt anymore.

"I…" ( _was wrong? A stupid kid? A volatile idiot?_ ) "should go—"

As he starts to hoist himself up, he feels her hand gently wrap around his arm. It's not a firm grip, he could easily break away if he wished to, but when she tugs him weakly he has no other choice but to glance at her again. She looks exhausted, her red hair spilled against the bed's sheets beneath her, and her eyes are slightly glazed over as she stares at him imploringly.

"Please do not go."

He wishes he could ask the same of her.

He wishes he could say that they should really get back to the party being held specifically for her; he wishes to selfishly say if _you don't stay, then I won't either_ , but this is Starfire he's dealing with and everything about him was always so soft and acquiescent when it came to her before, so why should it be any different now?

"Please, just for a few more moments." She pauses, choosing her next words carefully. "I would enjoy to do more of the catching up… I have missed you, Robin."

He hears nothing but the word 'missed' and his head feels heavy, like he's been dangling it upside down for a while. Slowly, he slides back down and when he sees the sides her lips curve upward, he sighs inwardly.

"Alright. Just for a few minutes."

A few minutes spans out into what feels like hours spent in her room, speaking in hushed voices and recalling significant parts of their past separate lives and blatantly dancing around the subject of whether she's staying or not. He tries not to be bitter, to not discerningly explain the advantages and reasons why she needs to stay here, because he thinks of how he's nothing but stilted logic and ethical rules and she's this wondrous, unworldly being that's too ethereal for Jump City and shouldn't be held down by past obligations or his own personal selfish reasons.

Instead he mutters on and on about the ongoing battle between her old team and the H.I.V.E academy as the natural darkness of her room filled with shades of lilac purples and pastel pinks slowly fades into onset blackness and when light finally filters in, morning is breaking against the sky.

Robin immediately jerks forward, his heart pounding against his ribcage when he realizes he accidentally fell asleep on her bed. When he reaches over with the intent to profusely apologize, he grasps at nothing on the other end of the bed. His hand sweeps over the comforter and there's no lingering warmth there. No one's been laying aside of him for quite some time.

Panic surges through his body and he scrambles to his feet, bolting for the room's door. What if she left? She would've said goodbye, right?

He looks frantically down the hallway and his breath hitches, straining to hear what sounds like an airy laugh loft through the empty room.

It sounds almost like an echo, the last remnant — a mere memory he latched on to, but maybe it's a real, tangible thing. Maybe it really is Starfire.

He sharply rounds the corner into the main living area, his lungs struggling to catch up with his mad dash down the hallway. He peers hesitantly around the occupied room before breathlessly questioning,

"S-Starfire?"

* * *

 **A/N:** I don't even know… I think I edited this a million times and rewrote the ending a lot but I'm sort of somewhat satisfied with this ambiguous conclusion? I'll let you readers decide how it ended. Anyway, on a different note, I sometimes think people characterize Starfire something less than she really is, and I really hope little glimpses of her independence came across in this story even if it was told mostly through Robin's third person perceptive. Anyway, thanks for reading it to the end, I appreciate it!


End file.
